Tuesday, April 20, 2010

I'm too stoned to think up a clever title...

Twitter has a way of blowing things way out of proportion. So, this morning when I woke up and checked my Twitter, I was inundated with "Happy 420!" & "It's 4/20!" tweets (not to mention a few texts). I've never "celebrated" this "holiday" before and I thought, "Ok, why not? I've only been smoking for 3, maybe 4, years and was always busy with something on the blessed day…so, here’s my chance.”

To “celebrate” 420, I just assume that one smokes pot all day and behaves in the manner of a typical stoner. .............Wait…. aren’t stoners really the only ones that recognize 420? Why do they need a specific day to get high? They do it all the fucking time! So, that’s what I did: everything I would normally do on a real lazy day off…something I do all the fucking time! (I love my job!)

Before I was going to fully commit to this, I had to know where “420” came from. I never really cared before today; I just went with the “Hitler’s birthday” story. I should’ve known better because I did always think it stupid that everyone would decide to make Hitler’s birthday the official, non-official weed smoking day. “We’re gonna smoke a bunch of weed; that’ll show the Nazis!” Like, WTF?

Turns out, it has nothing to do with Hitler:
The term was coined from a group of teenagers called the Waldos at San Rafael High School in San Rafael, California in 1971. The teens, all having after school sports practice, met afterwards at 4:20 p.m. to begin a search for a crop of abandoned cannabis growing near Point Reyes that they had heard about. They never found the stash, but smoked plenty of marijuana while looking for it. Thus, they would use the term 420 to reference smoking around their teachers and parents. Then, there’s something about one of the kids’ dad was the tour manager for the Dead (what was apparently left of the Grateful Dead) and the kid would hang around, use the newly coined phrase and it just magically caught on. Stoners are dumb like that. ;) Anyway, thanks Wikipedia; you’re a gem!

So, after finding out that tidbit of history was really boring, I downloaded Russell Brand’s latest live DVD to brighten things up. (Fuck off; it’s not available in the US. I’ll owe him a twenty when I shag him after a show.) It was brilliant! Apparently, he did a BBC Radio show in which he left a very witty yet, offensive musical voicemail to a famous (?) actor and it caused a huge scandal over there. For the record, had he done that in the US, he would’ve been fine. He showed some news footage of paparazzi in front of his house and it is hilarious! Also, while he was standing between the rows on the floor, some girl just stood up, flashed him, and sat right back down…the look on Russell Brand’s face was of such shock, it was so funny! But one thing I don’t get is when comedians only have like 2 or 3 CDs or DVDs available but yet the same one or two jokes is on every single one. Don’t they listen to their own shit and think maybe they should just do a new joke there instead? I’ve seen 3 shows of Russell Brand’s and he uses the same joke in all three. You’d think, at the very least, the second time he’d have known to maybe mix it up a bit more for the third go around. I gotta say, though…that man has the vocabulary of Word of the Day toilet paper. I swear he owns it and just has a very good memory when he shits. It’s VERY sexy, though. And makes perfect sense… the more words one knows, the more jokes possible. The British accent helps, too. That’s my biggest weakness: skinny British boys with a rapier wit…..it’s the Doctor Who fan in me.

Then I went to the bank and Blimpie. EXCITING!

Whilst eating my delicious Blimpie sub, I watched this thing on BBC America called Doctor Who: The Official Guide. It was pretty bullshit standard stuff: this is Rose Tyler, the Doctor has a Tardis, Daleks are bad, blah blah, etc. etc. BUT THEN they showed THIS! I must’ve giggled like a little girl for at least 5 minutes. I KNEW Matt Smith would be brilliant. I love this guy. I can’t wait to see this episode! The weeping angels AND River Song in the same episode! I love River Song’s backstory; it’s so mysterious and can fit in absolutely anywhere in the Doctor’s timeline. I have a tiny hope that maybe she’s actually Amy Pond all grown up…

I got the first season of Secret Diary of a Call Girl because, of course I want to see Rose Tyler’s boobs! Now I know I’ve mentioned this before, but I’ll reiterate: sometimes I like to pretend that actors in different TV shows are really just one character in a different setting.(Not as bad as THIS guy, though!) Like this show, for example, could be just something went horribly wrong in the parallel universe that Rose Tyler got left in and the other Doctor is long gone so now she’s a prostitute to get by. After a few episodes, if the show’s good, you get into it and forget that it’s the old character and get used to the new. But then sometimes, you get thrown a curveball (kind of like Christopher Eccleston playing a character on Heroes) and you immediately go back to that original character and it’s fun and funny at the same time. That’s what happened to me about 6 episodes in and I freaked out!

In case you can’t tell, that’s MATT SMITH in bed with ROSE TYLER! The best part is, he’s the ONE guy in the whole series she fucks for free. Hilarious!

Keep in mind, I’m smoking a lot of weed today…..though, probably not too much more than normal. I’m already naturally quite silly but the pot certainly doesn’t help.

I started Bayonetta, finally. It’s pretty awesome. Lots of button pushing. Haha! I didn’t get very far before the Suns game started so, we’ll see how the story part of it is.

Suns game was AWESOME! That’s how our first game should’ve gone but it’s no big deal, it’s just one game. I really hope we sweep the rest of the series. That’d be a nice “fuck you”. I still have no idea who I want to win the Mavericks/Spurs series. I think I’m just going to be neutral about it and let whatever happens, happen. Hopefully, that happening ends with us in the finals.

I’m going to watch LOST (OMG!) then play Bayonetta for the rest of the night. Overall, a good 420, but more like an average day off. I’m very lucky and I don’t forget it.

Now, here’s some eye candy for you:


  1. Now THAT is some serious stream of consciousness shit! LOL! Whatever the reason... the day full of weed, the day full of Blimpie, trying to process a day of Russell Brand, Doctor Who, and basketball.... that turned into one damn interesting read. I think we readers deserve a running time clock or something next time so we can watch this as some sort of real-time diary of a day in the life of April... oh, fuck-- did I just give you an idea? Keep them posts coming, and I'll keep them posts reading!

  2. "That’s my biggest weakness: skinny British boys"

    Sweet now I know I'm totally in next time!

  3. You are so smart, and beautiful and lovely :) I love knowing about u :) :*

  4. you're lucky to be so hot and cool. a real rarity.

  5. Jason Richardson getting off recently!

  6. That guy on the end of the phone call was Andrew Sachs, who was the bumbling hispanic waiter in John Cleese's Sitcom 'Fawlty Towers'
    I don't know the exact story but basically him and Jonathan Ross (another funny brit, our Letterman if you will) made the call and I think Brand basically bragged down the line that he had fucked Sachs' Grand-daughter because he had, funny thing is the people who complained were those who read about it in the paper the day after and don't actually listen to the show, then the whole thing becomes a media shitstorm... its a bit like islamic extremists getting po`ed at Trey Parker & Matt Stone for South park 201. Anyway.. There was alot of apologising, Ross' tv show got taken off the air for a few weeks and Brand I think resigned from his radio slot, overall I don't think either of their careers were affected.

    I like that actor association thing you did, I saw a fan edit where someone had spliced batman begins, the machinist and american psycho into one movie to show a playboy who has an alter ego as a serial killer, all before his mansion blows up and he wakes up months later with amnesia and bullemia.

  7. wowh,,,,


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